Wilba/Quotes/Hamlet

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Hamlet

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Hamlet

“WILBA DOST NAUGHT WANTS TO RULE”

–Wilba

"WILBA MOST EXCELLENT FANCY"

This page lists Wilba's Quotes which are spoken when the player examines an in-game item or object. The player can alt-click items and objects to examine them.

Due to the amount of text catalogued, this page only contains Wilba's quotes for items found in Hamlet. For items exclusive to other expansions, see the pages listed above.

Tools

• Shears- "FOR THE CUTTINGS OF THE SHRUBS."

Lights

• Cork Candle Hat- "ON, ON, BRIEF CANDLE!"
• Cowl- "UNEASY LIES THE HEAD THAT WEARS THE FLYING RAT."

Survival

• Bug B'Gone- "IT KILLETH THE TEENY BUGS."
• Bird Whistle- "WILBA SING LIKE BIRDIES I' THE CAGE"

Food

• Sprinkler- "TIS DRINKIES FOR WILBA FOODS."

Science

• Smelter- "TIS FWOOSHY MACHINES."
• Oscillating Fan- "BLOW WINDS!"

Fight

• Halberd- "WILBA SHALL SLICE AND CHOP!"
• Cork Bat- "WILBA MAKETH THE SMALLEST SMASHINGS"
• Weevole Mantle- "ADVENTURE CLOTHES FROM ANNOYING BUGS."
• Mant Mask- "WILBA WEAR'ST PIG BUTT"
• Mant Suit- "WILBA AM MERELY PLAYER"
• Fancy Helmet- "SHINY HAT DOTH PROTECTETH BRAINPAINS"
• Tin Suit- "TO TAKE ARMS"
• Blunderbuss- "FULL O' SOUND AND FURY"

Structures

• Cork Barrel- "MINE TEENY TREASURE!"

Refine

• Claw Palm Sapling- "'TIS TENDER SAPLING"

Magic

• Hogus Porkusator- "IT GIVETH WILBA SMARTS"
• Pugalisk Wand- "HATH THE TWINKLING OF AN EYE"
• Skyworthy (Hamlet and non-Hamlet world)- "THAT WAY MADNESS LIES"
• Living Artifact- "WILBA HATH GREATNESS THRUST 'PON HER!"
• Root Trunk- "KEEPETH WILBA'S STUFF"
• Vortex Cloak- "HATH MORE THAN IT SHOW'TH"

Dress

• Gas Mask- "IT FIT-ETH OVER MINE SNOUT"
• Pith Hat- "PROTECT-ETH MINE BRAINPAN"
• Thunderhat- "WILBA READY FOR ADVENTURE."

Nautical

• Cork Bowl Canoe- "FRAILTY, THY NAME IS'T CORK BOWL CANOE!"

​Treasure Hunting

• Disarming Tools- "WILBA CAN'ST BEAT-ETH NASTY TRICKY TRAPS NOW"
• Ball Pein Hammer- "FORTH MINE TEENY SMASHINGS"
• Gold Pan- "'TIS A PAN FOR GLITTERIES"
• Magnifying Glass- "IT LOOKETH 'PON UNDISCOVER'D STUFFS"

​City Planning

• Lamp Post (off)- "'TIS ONLY ALIGHT AT NIGHT"
• Lamp Post (on)- "'TIS A LAMP"
• Town House- "WILBA HOME IS'T BIGGER"
• Town House (burning)- "HOUSE 'TIS FWOOSHING!"
• The Sterling Trough Deli- "HOLDETH THE NUM NUMS"
• The Sterling Trough Deli (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING NUM NUMS!"
• Pigg and Pigglet's General Store- "STUFFS CONTAINETH'DED HERE IN"
• Pigg and Pigglet's General Store (burning)- "STUFFS 'TIS FWOOSHING!"
• Curly Tails Mud Spa- "HATH THINGS FOR MINE BOO BOOS"
• Curly Tails Mud Spa (burning)- "'TIS A FWOOSH'DED"
• Swinesbury Fine Grocer's- "NUM NUMS WITHIN"
• Swinesbury Fine Grocer's (burning)- "FWOOSH'DING"
• Miss Sow's Floral Arrangements- "HATH SEEDS WITHIN"
• Miss Sow's Floral Arrangements (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING!"
• 'The Sty' Oddities Emporium- "'TIS HOUSE O' STRANGE THINGS"
• 'The Sty' Oddities Emporium (burning)- "HATH SEEN BETTER DAYS"
• The Flying Pig Arcane Shop- "TOIL AND TROUBLES"
• The Flying Pig Arcane Shop (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING"
• The Boar's Tusk Weapon Shop- "WILBA TAKE ARMS"
• The Boar's Tusk Weapon Shop (burning)- "WEAPONS DOST FWOOSHING!"
• The Sow's Ear Hat Shop- "DOST GOTS STUFFS FOR MINE HEAD"
• The Sow's Ear Hat Shop (burning)- "HATS GO-ETH FWOOSH!"
• Swinesbury Academy- "YON OLDEN THINGS DOST WITHIN THERE"
• Swinesbury Academy (burning)- "IS'T FWOOSHING!"
• Swinesbury Mineral Exchange- "'TIS HOUSE O' CHANGE"
• Swinesbury Mineral Exchange (burning)- "'TIS BURNING!"
• The Tinkerer's Tower- "THERE BE METHODS IN'T"
• The Tinkerer's Tower (burning)- "FWOOSHY FWOOSH!"
• Swinesbury City Hall- "'TIS MAYOR HOMES"
• Swinesbury City Hall (burning)- "'TIS A-FWOOSH'DED"
• My City Hall- "MINE OTHER HOME WAS'T BIGGER"
• My City Hall (burning)- "WHOFORE DO-ETH THAT?!"
• Security Contract- "HENCEFORTH I SHALL HATH HENCHMEN"
• Slanty Shanty- "TO MINE OWN HOUSE BE TRUE"
• Slanty Shanty (locked)- "NOT FOR ALL MARKETS"
• Slanty Shanty (burnt)- "WHOFORE ART FWOOSH'DED MINE HOME?!"
• Watch Tower- "FROM YON TOWER THY CAN'ST SEE YONDER"
• Watch Tower (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING!"

​Renovate

• House Expansion Permit- "FOR THE UNDISCOVER'D PANTRY"
• Demolition Permit- "NOW WILBA TAKE ARMS AGAINST A SEA OF RUBBLE"

Flooring

• Wood Flooring, and Wood Panel Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' THE SPLINTERS"
• Marble Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' STONES"
• Checkered Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' CHECKERS"
• Slate Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' CUNNING'ST PATTERN"
• Sheet Metal Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' COLD SLIPPY STUFFS"
• Garden Stone Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' THE OUTSIDES"
• Geometric Tiles Flooring, Hexagon Flooring, and Octagon Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' THE FUNNY SHAPES"
• Shag Carpet- "'TIS FLOOR O' THE SOFT TOESIES"
• Transitional Flooring- "FLOOR IS'T UNDONE"
• Herringbone Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' THE COLD"
• Curcy Hoof Flooring- "'TIS FLOOR O' WILBA'S PEOPLE"

Shelves

• Carved Bookshelf, Hutch Shelf, Industrial Shelf, Adjustable Shelf, Windowed Cabinet, and Wall Mounted Shelf- "'TIS A HOLDY THING"
• Basic Bookshelf- "'TIS A HOLDY THING O' TREE STUFFS"
• Cinderblock Bookshelf- "IT HOLD-ETH STUFFS, METHINKS"
• Marble Shelf- "'TIS FANCY HOLDY THING"
• Glass Shelf- "'TIS BREAKABLE HOLDY THING"
• Ladder Shelf- "'TIS HOLDY THING MADE O' CLIMBY THING"
• A-Frame Shelf- "IT HOLD-ETH STUFFS"
• Crates Shelf- "IT HOLD-ETH STUFFS, METHINKS"
• Fridge- "WHATFORE CAN'ST IT HOLD?"
• Floating Shelf- "IT HOLDETH THINGS ALL SLANTY"
• Pipe Shelf- "HANGY THING"
• Hat Tree- "HOLD-ETH WILBA HEAD STUFFS"
• Pallet Shelf- "'TIS HOLDY THING?"

Plantholders

• Basic Plantholder, Fancy Plantholder, Draceana Plantholder, Xerographica Plantholder, Palm Plantholder, ZZ Plantholder, Fernstand Plantholder, Fern Plantholder, Pitcher Plantholder, and Marble Plantholder- "'TIS PLANTY PLANT"
• WIP Plantholder- "'TIS BUSH O' TIED UPNESS"
• Bonsai Plantholder- "'TIS PLANT O' ZEN"
• Dishgarden Plantholder- "'TIS DISH O' PLANTY PLANT"
• Philodendron Plantholder- "'TIS PLANT O' LEAFS ONLY"
• Orchid Plantholder- "'TIS PLANT O' FLOWERS"
• Birdcage Plantholder- "YON PLANT 'TIS IMPRISON'D"
• Terrarium Plantholder- "'TIS HOUSE O' PLANTY PLANT"
• Plantpet Plantholder- "'TIS PLANTY PET"
• Traps Plantholder- "'TIS PLANT O' BITEY PARTS"
• "Character" Tree- "WHYFORE IT SO SAD?"
• Festive Tree- "O HAPPY DAY!"

Columns

• Planed Wood Column and Millinery Column- "'TIS STRONG ENOUGH"
• Round Column- "IT KEEPETH A ROOF OVER MINE HEAD"
• Lit Marble Column- "'TIS FANCY WAY TO KEEP ROOF OVER MINE HEAD"

Wall Papers

• Wood Paneling- "'TIS WALL O' CHEAPNESS"
• Checkered Wall Paper- "'TIS WALL O' CHECKERS"
• Floral Wall Paper- "'TIS WALL O' THE PRETTY"
• Sunflower Wall Paper- "AM TOO MUCH IN THE SUNFLOWER"
• Harlequin Wall Paper- "'TIS WALL O' THE FOOLS"
• Peagawk Wall Paper- "'TIS WALL O' THE BIRDIES"
• Orange Wall Paper, and Purple Wall Paper- "'TIS WALL O' BORING"
• Rope Wall Panneling- "TO BE OR KNOT TO BE"
• Circle Wall Tiling- "'TIS WALL O' FUNNY SHAPES"
• Marble Wall Tiling- "'TIS WALL O' HARDNESS"
• Fine Wall Tiling- "'TIS WALL O' BIG HEADED PIGGY"
• Full Wall Moulding- "'TIS WALL O' SQUARESIES"
• Upholstered Wall- "'TIS WALL O' SQUISHIES"

Ceiling Lights

• Wired Bulb, Rope Light, and Dual Rope Light- "'TIS A BULB O' LIGHT"
• Metal Shade Lamp, Hanging Blooming Lamp, and Hanging Floral Lamp- "'TIS A LIGHT"
• Chandelier- "'TIS A LIGHT O' TEENY FWOOSHINGS"
• Blown Glass Bulb- "'TIS BUNCH O' TEENY LIGHTS"
• Cherry Lamp Shade- "'TIS LIGHT O' YUM YUMS FRUITS"
• Tophat Light and Derby Light- "'TIS A LIGHT O' FANCY HAT"

Wall Decorations

• Photo- "'TIS UNPIG"
• Full Length Mirror- "WILBA CAN'ST LOOKETH 'PON MINE VISAGE"
• Embroidery Hoop- "'TIS FANCY NEEDLE-INGS"
• Mosaic- "'TIS A BUNCH'D O' ROCKS"
• Wreath- "'TIS A ROUND THING"
• Axe- "'TIS FOR THE CHOP CHOPS"
• Hunt- "'TIS A STABBY THING"
• Periodic Table- "'TIS NAUGHT ART"
• Gears Art- "'TIS CLOCKWORKS"
• Cape- "'TIS A SHOULDER BLANKETS"
• No Smoking- "WILBA NAUGHT SMOKE"
• Black Cat- "YON KITTY HATH SHIFTY EYES"
• Tasteful Fish Mounting- "IT DOTH OFFEND'D MINE NOSE"
• Beefalo Mounting- "IT DOTH SMELLETH RANK"

Chairs

• Classic Chair- "'TIS CHAIR"
• Corner Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE CORNER"
• Bench- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE TWO PIGGIES"
• Horned Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE HORN-BEASTIES"
• Footrest- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE HOOFS"
• Lounge Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE LAZINESS"
• Massager Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE ROGUES"
• Stuffed Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE COMFY BUMS"
• Rocking Chair- "'TIS CHAIR O' THE TOPSY-TURVY"
• Ottoman Chair- "'TIS CHAIR FOR MINE HOOFS"
• Fancy Chaise- "'TIS CHAIR O' TWO PIGGIES"

House Upgrades

• Cottage Kit- "WILBA CAN'ST MAKETH A HOME WITHAL"
• Tudor Home Kit- "'TIS THE MAKINGS O' MINE HOME"
• Gothic Home Kit- "SUCH STUFFS AS HOUSES ARE MADE ON"
• Brick Home Kit- "WILBA HATH SHELTER FROM WIND"
• Turreted Home Kit- "A PIECE OF WORK FOR WILBA"
• Villa Kit- "WILBA SHALL'T BUILDETH A BIG HOME"
• Manor Kit- "'TIS STUFFS DREAM HOUSES ARE MADE ON"

Doors

• Hardwood Door, Wrought Iron Door, Curtained Door, and Industrial Door- "ENTER WILBA"
• Stone Archway- "AS COLDETH AS ANY STONE"
• Forest Door- "HATH THE CUTE FEETSIES"
• Round Doorway- "IS ROUNDED WITH CHEEK"
• Gothic Door- "RAT O' FLYING DOOR"

Windows

• Peaked Curtain Window, Round Burlap Window, Peaked Window, Square Window, Tall Window, Large Square Curtain Window, and Tall Curtain Window- "'TIS A WINDOW"
• Greenhouse Wall- "'TIS WINDOW O' BIGNESS"

Rugs

• Eye Rug- "STAREST NAUGHT AT WILBA!"
• Square Throw Rug- "YON RUG DOST LOOK LIKE STONES"
• Oval Rug- "'TIS A RUG O' PRETTY FLOWERS"
• Large Rug- "'TIS A RUG O' PRETTY FLOWERS"
• Fur Throw Rug- "A BOLTING-HUTCH OF BEASTLINESS"
• Hedgehog Rug- "'TIS A RUG O' CUTE UNPIG"
• Porcupus Rug- "'TIS BOMBARD OF SACK"
• Hoofprint Rug- "'TIS RUG O' FANCY PIGGIES"
• Octagon Rug, Swirl Rug, Braid Rug, and Soccer Rug- "'TIS A RUG"
• Catcoon Rug- "LUMP OF FOUL DEFORMITY"
• Rubbermat Rug- "'TIS RUG O' BOUNCY"
• Web Rug- "'TIS RUG O' STICKIES"
• Metal Rug- "'TIS FLAT METAL FOR FLOOR"
• Wormhole Rug- "IT WORKETH NAUGHT"
• Beard Rug- "'TIS MADE O' UNPIG CHIN HAIR"
• Nailbed Rug- "'TIS RUG O' SPIKY BITS"
• Crime Rug- "HATH THE SHAPE O' UNPIG ON'T"

Lamps

• Fringe Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE STRINGY BITS"
• Stainglass Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE SHINY GLASS"
• Downbridge Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE DROOPY"
• Dual Embroidered Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE TWO ROSES"
• Ceramic Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE FLOWERS"
• Glass Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE BREAKY BITS"
• Dual Fringes Lamp- "'TIS TWO LAMPS O' THE STRINGY BITS"
• Candelabra Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE FIRE HAZARD"
• Elizabethan Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE FANCY"
• Gothic Lamp- "'TIS INSIDE LAMP O' THE OUTSIDE LAMP"
• Orb Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' THE ROUNDNESS"
• Bellshade Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' BLACK"
• Crystals Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' SHINY BITS"
• Upturn Lamp- "'TIS LAMP THAT DOST POINT TO SKY"
• Dual Upturn Lamp- "'TIS TWO LAMPS O' FUNNY HATS"
• Spool Lamp- "'TIS LAMP"
• Edison Lamp- "YON LAMP DOST MISSING STUFFS"
• Adjustable Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' CHANGING PARTS"
• Right Angle Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' SIMPLENESS"
• Fancy Lamp- "'TIS LAMP O' FANCY PIGGIES"

Tables

• Round Table- "'TIS TABLE"
• Hard Wood Desk- "'TIS TABLE O' STUDYING"
• DIY Table and College Table- "'TIS TABLE O' NAUGHT MUCH OINCS"
• Crate Table- "'TIS TABLE?"
• Chess Table- "'TIS TABLE O' CHECKERING"

Nature - Plants

• Claw Palm Tree- "'TIS TREE"
• Claw Palm Tree (burning)- "
• Claw Palm Tree (burnt)- "
• Claw Palm Tree (stump)- "
• Cork- "DOST HARDLY WEIGH A BIT"
• Claw Palm Sapling (planted)- "'TIS TENDER SAPLING"
• Rainforest Tree- "SHALL I COMPARE THEE TO ANOTHER TREE?"
• Rainforest Tree (burning)- "IS'T FWOOSHING"
• Rainforest Tree (burnt)- "ALL FWOOSH'D UP"
• Rainforest Tree (stump)- "CHOP'T"
• Sick Rainforest Tree- "'TIS SICK'DED"
• Cocooned Tree- "'TIS THE HOME OF MANY LEGG'D UNPIGS"
• Jungle Burr- "IT HOLDS FAST"
• Rainforest Tree Sapling- "'TIS BUT A BABE"
• Tea Tree- "YON SQUIRRELS DOST LIKETH YON TREE"
• Tea Tree (burning)- "
• Tea Tree (burnt)- "
• Tea Tree (stump)- "
• Seed Pod and Tea Tree Sapling- "TO EAT OR NOT TO EAT"
• Tuber Tree- "WILBA CAN'ST NAUGHT CHOPPETH WITH AXE"
• Tall Grass- "AS LONG AS THE DAY IS MERRY"
• Tall Grass (cut)- "THE LONG AND SHORT OF IT"
• Tall Grass (burning)- "FWOOSH'DING"
• Exotic Flower- "MANY COLOR'D FLOWERS FOR WILBA"
• File:Aloe Planted.pngAloe (planted)- "CAN'ST WILBA EAT-ETH?"
• File:Asparagus Planted.pngAsparagus (planted)- "HATH A FUNNY HAT"
• File:Radish Planted.pngRadish (planted)- "YON NUM NUMS IS'T HIDING"
• Nettle Vine- "'TIS THE PLANT O' CLEAR SNOUTS"
• Nettle Vine (picked)- "HATH NAUGHT THE GOOD STUFFS"
• Nettle Vine (withered)- "'TIS BROK'DEN"
• Nettle Vine (moist)- "'TIS HAPPY"
• Nettle Plant (held)- "WILBA SHALL'ST PUT IT IN GROUND"
• Bramble- "HATH THE PRICKERS"
• Bramble Bloom- "A ROSE BY OTHER NAME"
• Hanging Vine- "HANG'D VINE"
• Great Leafy Stalk- "'TIS STRONG TREE"
• Lotus Plant- "SHALL WILBA COMPARE IT TO SUMMER DAY?"
• Lily Pad- "'TIS SWIMMY LEAF"
• Reeds (water)- "IS'T A PLANT O' THE WATER"
• Lawn Decoration- "O WONDER!"
• Lawn Decoration (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING!"
• Lawn Decoration (burnt)- "FWOOSH'DED BITS"
• Hedge- "'TIS A SHRUB"
• Hedge (untrimmed)- "HATH NEEDS OF A SHAVE"
• Hedge (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING"
• Hedge (burnt)- "'TIS FWOOSH'DED"
• Intricate Topiary- "HAST THE LOOK OF ROYALTY ABOUT HIM"
• Magic Flower- "'TIS A FLOWER O' THE UNDISCOVER'D COUNTRY"
• Weathered Branch- "
• Weathered Shrub- "
• Weathered Stick- "
• Weathered Tree- "
• Weathered Trunk- "TIS BROK'DEN"

Nature - Objects

• Stone Slab- "'TIS ROCK"
• Dung Pile- "WILBA AM SICK WHEN SHE LOOK ON THEE"
• Dung Pile (picked)- "HAST BEEN PICK'DED THROUGH"
• Dung Ball- "SWOLLER PARCEL OF PLOPSIES"
• Thundernest- "'TIS HOME OF THE ZAPPY BIRD"
• Iron Hulk (head)- "ALAS, POOR ROBOT"
• Iron Hulk (hand)- "HATH NAUGHT A ROBOT HANDS?"
• Iron Hulk (ribs)- "HATH THE SLEEP OF DEATH"
• Iron Hulk (foot)- "THE ROBOT IS AFOOTS"
• Large Iron Hulk (partially assembled)- "'TIS UNFINISH'DED"
• Iron Ore- "'TIS METAL O' THE ZAPPY BIRD"
• Sparkling Pool- "ALL THAT GLITTERS 'TIS GOLD"
• Gold Dust- "'TIS DIRT O' SPARKLIES"
• Gnat Mound- "ALL THAT BUZZES IS GNAT HOME"
• Farm House- "YON HOUSE SMELLETH LIKE PLOPS"
• Farm House (burning)- "AVAST! 'TIS AFWOOSH'D!"
• Quarry Lodgings- "CONTAINETH PIGS O' THE ROCKS"
• Quarry Lodgings (burning)- "'TIS FWOOSHING! 'TIS FWOOSHING!"
• Secret Bandit Camp- "YONDER TREASURE!"
• Cave Cleft- "WHERE THE BAT SUCKS"
• Ruinous Entrance- "ADVENTURE LIE-ETH YONDER!"
• Mandrake Hill- "HATH THE STENCH O' THE WALKY VEGETABLES"
• Mant Hill- "'TIS NAUGHT MINE HOUSEHOLD"
• Crumbling Brazier- "NEED'ST SOME STICKS"
• Ancient Wall- "HATH OLD PIG MARKS 'PON IT"
• Fountain of Youth- "'TIS A BUNCH O' WATER"
• Ominous Carving- "WHEREFORE THIS GO?"
• Teetering Pillar- "'TIS A ROCK"
• Deflated Balloon- "'TIS DIED'D"
• Wicker Basket- "'TIS DIED'D"
• Monogrammed Luggage A- "WILBA TAKE MINE LEAVE OF IT"
• Monogrammed Luggage B- "WILBA TAKE MINE LEAVE OF IT"
• Useless Flags- "MOST EXCELLENT FANCIES"
• Bag of Sand- "WILBA TAKE MINE LEAVE OF IT"
• Rusty Lamp and Petrified Egg (1)- "'TIS BROK'DEN"
• Petrified Egg (2)- "WHEREFORE LITTLE BIRDIE?"
• Petrified Egg (3)- "'TIS CRUNCH'D, AND CRUNCH'D, AND CRUNCH'D"
• Petrified Egg (4)- "WHYFORE NO BIRDIE?"
• Weathered House- "'TIS HOUSE O' LONELY"
• Stone Thing- "WHEREFORE REST O' IT?"
• Lever Thing- "WILBA DISCOVER'D THE UNDISCOVER'D"
• Rock Thing- "THERE IS METHOD IN'T " [sic]
• Relic Thing- "WILBA FINDETH PLACE FOR IT"
• Iron Thing- "OUTRAGEOUS FORTUNE!"

Nature - Caves

• Spooky Hole- "HATH THE FLYING RATS WITHIN"
• Unimportant Rock Pillar- "'TIS STRONG"

Nature - Ruinous Caves

• A Smashing Pot- "OUT DAMNED POT!"
• Dart Trap- "'TIS A SPITTY STONE PIG"
• Nasty Spear Trap- "WHATFORE DOTH DOWN YON TEENY HOLES?"
• File:Busted Spear Trap.pngBusted Spear Trap- "YON POINTY THINGS HATH BEEN BEAT'DEN!"
• Tempting Idol- "WILBA LIKETH THE TOP PART"
• Unimportant Pillar- "'TIS STRONG"
• Vines- "THESE VINES DOST PROTEST TO MUCH, METHINKS"
• Wall Brazier- "NEED'ST SOME STICKS"
• Wishing Well- "FORTUNE FOUNTAIN SMILE 'PON WILBA"
• End's Well- "ALLS WELL WITH ENDS WELL" [sic]
• Aporkalypse Calendar- "TIME AND THE HOUR RUNS THROUGH IT"

Nature - Mant Hill

• Antcomb Home- "'TIS NAUGHT MINE HOUSEHOLD"
• Honey Chest- "MAKETH THE SWEET YUMS"
• Lamp- "'TIS A LIGHT"
• Mant Warrior Egg- "'TIS BABY VILLAIN INSIDE"
• Stalacmite Throne- "WILBA CAN'ST SMASHIES TO GET-ETH THE STUFFS"

Nature - Palace

• Palace- "TIS MINE HOME AND SOMETIMES PRISON"
• Royal Gallery Exhibit- "OPEN, LOCKS, WHOEVER KNOCKS, AND HATH THE KEY"

Turfs

• Lawn Turf, Cultivated Turf, Beard Hair Rug, Dense Turf, Rainforest Turf, Wild Plains Turf, Painted Sand Turf, and Mossy Turf- "'TIS GROUND"
• Flat Stone Turf- "'TIS GROUND O' ROCKYNESS"
• Stone Road Turf- "'TIS ROAD"

Mobs - Monsters

• Ancient Spirit- "A GHOSTLY VISAGE"
• Giant Grub- "THERE'S THE GRUB"
• Gnat Swarm- "MUCH ADO ABOUT GNAT-ING"
• Hanging Vine- "IT HOLDS FAST!"
• Mant Warrior- "HAVE AT THEE!"
• Masked Pig- "'TIS FIEND!"
• Swashy Hat- "WHEREFORE-ART-ME-HAT."
• Bandit Stash Map- "LEAD-ETH TO YON TREASURE!"
• Poison Dartfrog- "IT SCREW TONGUE TO STICKING PLACE"
• Poison Dartfrog (sleeping)- "PERCHANCE IT DREAM?"
• Poison Dartfrog (dead)- "'TIS DEAD? YEA, 'TIS DEAD"
• Rabid Beetle- "FULL OF SOUND AND FURY"
• Rabid Beetle (sleeping)- "O GENTLE SLEEPIES"
• Rabid Beetle (dead)- "IN YON UNDISCOVER'D COUNTRY"
• Scorpion- "THEREBY HANGS A TAIL"
• Scorpion (sleeping)- "WILBA DOES MURDER IN SLEEP"
• Scorpion (dead)- "DEATH WILL HAS IS'T DAY"
• Snaptooth Seedling- "NAUGHT CLEAN ENOUGH TO SPIT 'PON"
• Snaptooth Seedling (sleeping)- "ROUND'DED WITH SLEEP"
• Snaptooth Seedling (dead)- "'TIS SHUFFL'DED OFF"
• Snaptooth Flytrap- "I'LL TICKLE YOUR CATASTROPHE!"
• Snaptooth Flytrap (sleeping)- "ITS EYELIDS DROOP"
• Snaptooth Flytrap (dead)- "THE SLEEP OF DEATH"
• Spider Monkey- "THOU LUMP OF FOUL DEFORMITY!"
• Spider Monkey (sleeping)- "SLEEP NO MORE!"
• Spider Monkey (dead)- "DAR'ST THOU DIED'D?"
• Vampire Bat- "YON RAT O' FLYING"
• Vampire Bat (sleeping)- "'TIS DOTH ITS SLEEPY TIMES"
• Vampire Bat (dead)- "WILBA SHALT SING A REQUIEM"
• Pig Skin?- "'TIS THE PIG SKIN O' THE BAT"
• Viper- "A BOLTING-HUTCH OF BEASTLINESS"
• Weevole- "GO AWAY BUGS"
• Weevole Carapace- "WILBA BEAT ANNOYING BUGS"

Mobs - Neutral Animals

• Elder Mandrake- "HE DOTH PROTEST TOO MUCH, METHINKS."
• Hippopotamoose- "THOU ART AS FAT AS BUTTER!"
• Hippopotamoose Antler- "'TIS EARS O' THE BIG BEASTIE"
• Mant- "WILBA WOULD BEAT THEE, BUT T'WOULD INFECT MINE HOOFS"
• Mant (sleeping)- "IT DOTH OFFEND MINE SENSES"
• Mant (dead)- "HATH BEEN VANQUISH'DED"
• Platapine- "FULL O' SOUND AND FURY"
• Platapine (sleeping)- "WEARY WITH TOIL"
• Platapine (dead)- "'TIS SHUFFL'DED OFF"
• Platapine Quill- "LIKE QUILLS 'PON THE FRETFUL PLATAPINE"
• Pog- "SOMETHING CUTIES THIS WAY COMES"
• Royal Guard- "WELL MET, PIGGY GUARD!"

Mobs - Passive Animals

• Banker- "HATH A TWINKLE IN'ST HIS EYE"
• Banker (sleeping)- "IS'T ROUNDED WITH SLEEP"
• Beautician- "SHE DOTH OFFEND'D MINE EYE"
• Beautician (sleeping)- "WHYFORE SHE SLEEPETH HERE?"
• Collector- "HE HATH THE WEIRD STUFF"
• Collector (sleeping)- "GOOD-NIGHT, GOOD-NIGHT!"
• Erudite- "SPEAK LESS THAN SHE KNOWEST"
• Erudite (sleeping)- "SUCH STUFFS DREAMS ARE MADE ON?"
• Farmer- "COUNTRYPIG LEND ME YOUR STUFFS"
• Farmer (sleeping)- "SIMPLE PIGS SLEEPETH OUTSIDES"
• Florist- "WILBA LIKETH THY HAT"
• Florist (sleeping)- "PERCHANCE SHE DREAM?"
• Hatmaker- "HAST THOU THINGS FOR 'PON MINE HEAD?"
• Hatmaker (sleeping)- "WHYFORE SLEEPEST THOU?"
• Hunter- "HE HATH LET DOWN HIS GUARD"
• Hunter (sleeping)- "HAS LET-ETH DOWN HIS GUARD"
• Mayor Truffleston- "HOW NOW, MAYOR?"
• Mayor Truffleston (sleeping)- "HAST HE NAUGHT A BED?"
• Miner- "HOW DO, MINE MINER!"
• Miner (sleeping)- "HAS'T HE NAUGHT A HOME?"
• Professor- "HATH SMACK OF AGE IN HIM"
• Professor (sleeping)- "ALAS, NAUGHT YET DEAD"
• Pig Queen- "MAMA, QUEEN OF HAMLETS"
• Shopkeep- "HER HAIR DOTH TOO MUCH, METHINKS"
• Shopkeep (sleeping)- "HAST NAUGHT GOOD JAMMIES"
• Usher- "HE LIKETH THE SWEET THINGS"
• Usher (sleeping)- "'TIS DEAD? NO 'TIS NAUGHT DEAD"
• Worker- "HE FIXETH STUFFS"
• Worker (sleeping)- "MUST NEED'ST TO FIXETH HIS BED"
• Kingfisher- "MARRY, BUT IT HATH A BIG BEAK!"
• Kingfisher (sleeping)- "SUCH STUFFS AS DREAMS ARE MADE ON"
• Kingfisher (dead)- "HATH SHUFFL'DED OFF"
• Parrot- "'ELLO POLLY!"
• Parrot (sleeping)- "O GENTLE SLEEP"
• Parrot (dead)- "BEREFT OF LIFE"
• Pigeon- "HEY DING A DING DING!"
• Pigeon (sleeping)- "HAST LEFT ITSELFS OPEN"
• Pigeon (dead)- "ALL LIVES MUST DIE"
• Dung Beetle- "HAS'T THE PLOPS"
• Dung Beetle (without Dung Ball)- "HAS'T NAUGHT THE PLOPS"
• Dung Beetle (sleeping)- "SLEEP NO MORE!"
• Dung Beetle (dead)- "HATH SHUFFLED OFF HIS MORTAL PLOP BALL"
• Glowfly- "IS'T A BUG O' GLOWY BUTT"
• Glowfly (sleeping)- "O GENTLE SLEEP!"
• Glowfly (dead)- "'TIS SQUISH'DED"
• Glowfly (cocoon)- "WRAPP'DED IN A BUGGY BLANKET"
• Pangolden- "NOSE HIMSELF TO BE A FOOL"
• Peagawk- "WHAT A ROGUE AND PEASANT SLAVE AM EYE-BIRD!"
• Peagawk (hiding)- "'TIS NAUGHT A BUSH"
• Peagawk (sleeping)- "O GENTLE SLEEP!"
• Peagawk (dead)- "IS'T EYES LOOKED IS'T LAST"
• Peagawk Plume- "IS'T A BIRD THING O' PRETTY"
• Piko- "FELLOWS OF INFINITE JEST"
• Piko (sleeping)- "O GENTLE SLEEP!"
• Piko (dead)- "HATH STOLEN LAST O' WILBA STUFFS"
• Orange Piko- "OF MOST EXCELLENT FANCY TAILS"
• Thunderbird- "'TIS BIRD O' ZAPPY"
• Thunder Feather- "WILBA FIND IT"

Mobs - Bosses

• Pugalisk- "BEAST WITH ONE BACK"
• Snake Bone- "ALAS, POOR SNAKEY"
• Petrifying Bones and Pugalisk Skull- "ALAS, POOR WORMY"
• Queen Womant- "'TIS A VILLAIN QUEEN!"
• Royal Crown- "UNEASY LIES HEAD THAT WEAR-ETH THE CROWN"
• Ancient Herald- "DOST FRETTING HIS HOUR 'PON THE STAGE"
• Dark Tatters- "STUFF THAT SCREAMS ARE MADE ON"
• Large Iron Hulk- "WHAT PIECES OF WORK MAKE ROBOT!"
• Infused Iron- "ALL THAT GLITTERS IS NAUGHT IRON"

Mobs - Other

• Maxameleon- "WHEREFORE ART YOU GO?"
• BFB (head)- "UNEASY LIES HIS HEAD"
• BFB (leg)- "BIG BIRDIE IS'T AFOOTS"
• BFB (tail)- "BEAST WITH BIG BACK"

Food - Meats

• Poison Dartfrog Legs- "TOE O' FROG"
• Cooked Dartfrog Legs- "FWOOSH'D TOE O' FROG"
• Gummy Slug- "HATH THE SLIME 'PON IT"
• Cooked Gummy Slug- "FWOOSH'D BUG O' SLIME"

Food - Vegetables

• Aloe- "'TIS A PLANT O' NUM NUMS"
• Cooked Aloe- "'TIS A FWOOSH'DED PLANT"
• Asparagus- "'TIS TEENY SPEAR O' NUM NUMS"
• Cooked Asparagus- "TIS FWOOSH'DED TEENY SPEAR"
• Bean Bugs- "MOST FOUL, STRANGE, AND UNNATURAL"
• Cooked Bean Bugs- "FWOOSH'D JUMPY BUG"
• Lotus Flower- "YON FLOWER O' NUM NUMS"
• Cooked Lotus Root- "FWOOSH'DED FLOWER O' NUM NUMS"
• Nettle- "DOST UNSTUFF'DED MINE SNOUTS"
• Radish- "'TIS A BALL O' NUM NUMS"
• Cooked Radish- "'TIS A FWOOSH'DED BALL O' NUMS"
• Tuber- "TUBER, OR NAUGHT TUBER"
• Fried Tuber- "TUBER, OR FWOOSH'D TUBER?"
• Blooming Tuber- "DOST HATH PRETTY FLOWER NOW"
• Fried Blooming Tuber- "'TIS FWOOSH'D AND FLOWER'D"

Food - Crock Pot

• Asparagus Soup- "'TIS SOUP O' THE SMELLYNESS"
• Feijoada- "'TIS A FOOD O' THE JUMPY BUG"
• Gummy Cake- "HATH THE CHEWINESS TO IT"
• Hard Shell Tacos- "IT CRACK NATURE'S MOLDS"
• Iced Tea- "AH... IT REFRESH-ETH"
• Nettle Rolls- "HATH THE SNOUT GOODNESS IN'T"
• Snake Bone Soup- "'TIS WAT'RY NUM NUMS"
• Spicy Vegetable Stinger- "HATH A FURY IN'T"
• Steamed Ham Sandwich- "WILBA THOUGHT SHE WAS'T HAVING STEAMED CLAMS"
• Tea- "IT DOST A DRINK O' FANCY PANTSY."

Food - Other

• Clippings- "MOST KINDEST CUTTINGS OF ALL"
• Cooked Seed Pod- "FWOOSH'DED NUT O' THE SQUIRRELY TREE"
• Flytrap Stalk- "WILBA CAN'ST MAKETH STUFF WITHAL"
• Nectar- "HOWFORE WILBA TURN IT TO THE SWEET YUMS?"
• Magic Water- "WILBA NEED'ST PUT IN GROUND"
• Aloe Seeds- "SEEDS CAN'ST GROW'DED FOODS"
• Asparagus Seeds- "SEEDS CAN'ST GROW'DED FOODS"
• Radish Seeds- "SEEDS CAN'ST GROW'DED FOODS"

Misc Items

• Silver Necklace- "PAPA GIVETH WILBA THIS FOR THE HAIRY TIMES"
• Oinc- "'TIS SHINY THING O' SMALL MONEYS"
• Tenpiece Oinc- "'TIS SHINY THING O' BIG MONEYS"
• Centapiece Oinc- "'TIS SHINY THING O' REALLY BIG MONEYS"
• Executive Hammer- "FOR BREAK'DING STREETSES"
• Lost Idol- "A FELLOW OF INFINITE JEST"
• Lost Totem- "WHENFORE THAT FROM?"
• Relic Fragment- "IS SPEAKS LESS THAN IT NOSE-EST"
• The Blue Sow- "IT LOOK'ETH LIKE MAMA"
• The Jeweled Truffle- "
• Pherostone- "'TIS A STONE O' SMELLINESS"
• Alloy- "IS'T BLOCK O' HARD METALS"
• Chitin- "YON BUGGY ARMOR"
• Stalking Stick- "'TIS A STICK 'O ZOOMIES"
• Deed of home ownership- "'TIS A WORTHY DEED"
• Regal Scepter- "WILBA DOST NAUGHT WANTS TO RULE"
• Royal Gallery Key- "WHATFORE IT OPEN-ETH?"
• Key to the City- "MY KINGDOM FOR A TOWN!"
• Queen Malfalfa- "DOST HAST A CERTAIN LIKENESS"
• Post Card of the Royal Palace- "IT SING-ETH THE PRAISES O' THE CITY"
• Can of Silly String- "HA! IT MAKE WILBA LAUGH'DED"
• Noxious Cloud- "'TIS COUGH COUGH CLOUD"

Announcements

• Can't buy item (generic)- "NAY, WILBA CAN'T"
• Can't buy item (not enough money)- "WILBA NEEDST MORE MONEYS"
• Cannot enter building (generic)- "IS'T CLOSED TO WILBA"
• Cannot enter building (locked)- "HOWFORE CAN WILBA UNLOCK'DED IT?"
• Cannot read Deed of home ownership (wrong area)- "'TIS A DEED FOR YONDER WORLD"
• Coughing- "HACK! COUGH! KECK! SNORT!"
• Digging in Dung Pile-
  • "SNORT!"
  • "OINC!"
  • "PLOPS!"
• Fog coming-
  • "WILBA AM TOO MUCH I' THE HEAT"
  • "THE AIR 'TIS FULL OF HEAT"
• Hay Fever starting- "SN--ORT. WILBA IS'T STUFFY"
• Hay Fever ending- "SNIFFS. WILBA NOSE IS'T NAUGHT STUFFY NO MORES!"
• Hitting Pugalisk in armored section-
  • "WILBA CAN'ST SMASH HENCE!"
  • "CAN'ST NAUGHT SMASHY SMASH THERE"
  • "WHYFORE NAUGHT IT SMASHIES?!"
• Putting on Living Artifact- "SOMETHING WILBA THIS WAY COMES!"
• Sneezing- "SNORT NEEZE A-CHOOEY!"
• Vampire Bats are coming- "FIE! FIE! BATS FLY!"

Removed

• BFB (head)- "UNEASY LIES HIS'T HEAD"